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8 Reasons to Give up and Accept Your Mediocrity

People go on and on about self-improvement. Everyone on social media is trying to be their hashtag best self. In Netflix’s new series Living With Yourself, Paul Rudd attempts to improve himself, but things do not go according to plan. Which begs the question; do we really want to become better people? You’ve made it this far being your basic average person. Here are eight reasons you should lean in to your mediocrity and just coast.

1. That gym membership budget can be spent on empanadas and gaming consoles. Let yourself go, honey! All the money you used to spend on haircuts and razors can now be spent on booze and donuts. Have you ever chased a shot of whiskey with a maple long john? Now that’s true living.

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2. Hey, when you put on weight you’ll finally fit into that shirt you bought online. That novelty XXXXL superhero shirt is comfortable and functional. It’s like wearing a giant napkin.

3. You’ll have less to lose when it all comes crumbling down. If you lose your job or your spouse leaves you for her healer, you’ll be cool with it. You were doing the bare minimum anyway. And if things go really wrong, like a nuclear winter comes or the lizard people show up to enslave the human race, you’ll be surprisingly calm.

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4. Climate change is coming for us all anyway, so why bother? Scientists have given us, what, 40, 50 years, tops? What’s the point of being a better person when the world is about to be on fire. Eat whatever, say whatever, watch Living With Yourself instead of going to work, use plastic straws in front of a sea turtle, go nuts!

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5. You can quit faking it when it comes to dating. Now when you online date you don’t have to pretend you love traveling or hiking or volunteering with at-risk Pomeranians. Be real. You like sitting on the couch, eating hot wings, and playing Zombie Kills Werewolf or whatever. This is who you are, like it or leave it, you’ve got whiskey-donut shots to do.

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6. Same thing goes for work. Performance reviews will be a breeze - you’re going to do the bare minimum and try to fly under the radar as usual.

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7. Finally you can be honest with your family about having no direction. Oh, sweet, sweet honesty. When your uncle asks when you are going back to grad school at the next family barbeque you can confidently say, “Never, Uncle Randy, I’m never going back to grad school. I’m going to stay the same ol’ average dude for the rest of time, pass the potato salad.”

8. Binge without guilt. Now that we have determined a life of incredible mediocrity is what your future holds, you might as well spend your valuable free time bingeing. Binge it all! Junk food, Living With Yourself on Netflix, porn, the world is your disgusting oyster!

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This post is a sponsored collaboration between Netflix and Onion Labs.

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